Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Not again! When will it end?

My eighth grade World History teacher Mr. Fox boldly stood in front of each class sternly warning each student in attendance of the invisible powers of the medium called Media, “They’re fully capable of distortion! They’ll feed you heaping spoons full of propaganda while patting your head like a mother on your sick bed to add warmth to the written medicine that makes you feel comfortable enough to heal quickly.”



He didn’t believe in the plights that once haunted the used to be Soviet Union, “I’ve been there!” He’d shout, “Outside of the rough ingredients they used for toilet paper I couldn’t see nor did I come face to face with what was being fed to me through media sources back home in America. The media is painting a bad picture of a world we can’t physically touch until we get there!”



Goodness…



We were eighth graders locked inside several thoughts and single points of view, the biggest being our nation as it prepared to celebrate its Bicentennial—most of us had our tickets to climb inside the traveling Freedom Train which featured a giant bell with a well publicize crack through its side.



Those not plummeted by Jimmy Carter’s fuel crisis collected shiny new quarters and silver dollars that featured patriotic symbols that shouted, “I love my country!”



Unless you were a farmer whose winter wheat was being shipped overseas or an incredibly brave man or woman preparing for what a cold war can offer…to a kid caught in the ranks of middle school, the idea of there being anything more than American interest in other places of a world that appeared round seemed almost flat.



Maybe it was his job to teach our eyes to watch for shadows—



I’m embarrassed to admit that I had no clue my home state of Montana was the secret hiding place of the Minute Man Missile project that would defend our nation if attacked. I found out the hard way…a fresh from the oven newlywed in Lewistown caught up in an act of discovery took note of the tremendous amount of military led convoys that crawled through town. As gutsy as a cowboy clown in a wild drunk man’s rodeo…I elected to follow the team of dedicated alignment of daily stars.



In 1981 we didn’t have instant access to the web—we depended on libraries and the Encyclopedia Britannica. Damn those individuals who couldn’t keep them in alphabetical order! It was inside those thinly printed pages of way too darn cool history that I learned Lewistown’s nickname was Missile City USA.



Holy cow my first real radio performance at KXLO and KLCM was ground zero. Toss in the Hollywood television flick The Day After based on what could happen to our great collection of incredible states if something tragic did occur and without a doubt the Drama Queen inside me couldn’t wait to escape. And where did I end up? In the Carolina’s which according to this movie is a freaky place to hang your dreams.



I often sit back and wonder what Mr. Fox would’ve thought of today’s presentation of the media. A major chunk of his doubt in the system wobbles in my aging knees—they act like seeds by way of constantly keeping an eye on reality while toasting the occasional mystery with a sip of interest as seen through a foreigners approach to what we call the best way to live on Mother Earth.



I’m ashamed to admit my heart sunk twelve feet when the media announced this morning at 6 that Tiger Wood’s tales have been nothing more than the government’s way of masterminding a plan with the media to take your personal view off the 30,000 troops set to move into Afghanistan. By making Tiger the target of immoral issues, we’ve spent millions of dollars on propaganda while wasting billions of minutes attempting to locate every reason why our modern day Superman is anything but human.



If life suddenly changed and the average blue collar American was finally delivered the truth…what other major disasters and or larger than life newspaper headlines would you begin to question?



I’ve heard more stories about OJ having a connection to President Clinton. Something about playing golf a week before the pro football player’s world began to tumble. The infamous Clinton Mafia where ten people unexpectedly disappeared with no true trace as to why CIA Miami couldn’t solve it inside an hour. Has Charlie Sheen been hired by secret agents to constantly get busted for crimes most people go to prison for? Is Simon Cowell leaving American Idol to finalize his dreams of marrying Paula Abdul to keep American minds off the possible disappearance of more homes and jobs?



Do you believe in conspiracy? Have you ever been too deep in a single presentation that you physically begin to believe that Big Brother has you pegged? It’s got to be true! The government spends ga-zillions on making sure you butter your toast in the morning that they totally took their eye off the underwear bomber on Christmas day. Or! Or! Was it part of a different conspiracy because a Santa stand-in was being used and how dare we ever find out the North Pole has duped us.



The current issue of Rollingstone Magazine uncovers the faces of the evil individuals who find faith and energy in the idea of promoting that the Greenhouse Effect isn’t real. I was shocked to read about how the media is on their list of buttheads to blame for taking the human mind, body and soul away from this planets most tragic time since its incarnation.



I don’t want to believe the media is the golden vein of propaganda. There are too many visionaries and warriors with pens inside the ranks of decision making whose loyalty to the truth is far more important than the positions they hold. Can you imagine if WBTV reporter Chris Clackum hadn’t stepped out of the box and unveiled the secrets of what Jessica Hahn and a one time incredibly powerful man named Jim Bakker did off the PTL campus?



What if that incident was used to keep your life off the events of what was really taking place around the world? Isn’t that pretty much what today’s 6 AM story was pointing out? Why would the government use Tiger Woods as an engine to push the world away from sliding 30,000 troops into a war torn area when the President has made his insight and purpose incredibly clear from the very second it was given birth?



We should be wearing labels that read: Warning…at times this human can be hazardous to your health. The situation may turn into a crisis after being set near anything connected to Hollywood news.

There are only two people I trust in the media Ryan Seacrest and Dick Clark. They make you want to love America. I'll call it quits if Ryan writes me a letter and says, "Dude, I'm a secret agent for Betty Crocker...my job is to get you to eat sweets and a lot of them. How am I doing so far?"



arroecollins@clearchannel.com

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