Ever find yourself cuddling a soft pillow on a giant living room sofa tuning out the vibrant colors of the flat screen only to take note of the enormous amount of energy being poured into open wounds created by a never ending question, “Why don’t I fit in?”
Being liked requires two clicks on Face Book being accepted is a separate beast.
I’ve never listened long enough to radio super jock Howard Stern to develop an opinion but his most recent interview in Rollingstone Magazine resembles more of a mirrored reflection of society rather the assumed ego driven single man’s journey toward the unseen horizon.
Inside his mental caverns and endless wandering paths lives a voice fixed on connecting more with a passerby than following personal endeavors. It’s never been about how he felt about his performance but more importantly did you like it? Such concentration has made him admittedly neurotic.
Stand back ten feet from your office chair or highway fix it crew and expose the truths about the circles you keep. To whom do you allow inside? And when the fit is no longer snug what measures are used to eliminate the excess fat?
While Stern might make millions quaking unexpected thoughts through firmly attached speakers the recently unveiled printed portrait uncovers a man behind a microphone that wants nothing more than to fit in.
Tribes author Seth Godin takes the ball and runs with it by explaining most people work so hard to fit in others don’t notice them. How often do you eat at the same restaurant? Did you really need that Ipad or was it the hot new fad? Do you truly care about Charlie Sheen’s antics or does talking about it at work or at Starbucks opens the door to fitting in?
What gives? From a distant planet it must look like earthlings are co-dependent.
That’s not happening! Research shows Google wasn’t an overnight success because most people are horrified of being curious. Once in front of a blank computer screen we evolve into the cute robot in the movie Short Circuit demanding more input. The more information we get the more we want to share it. The more we talk the faster we turn people off. Now we no longer fit in. Crap! What are the chances you made it this far?
Godin encourages you to think about this, “You won’t be able to grow your career or feed your tribe by going after more people.”
Basically meaning who gives a rat’s butt how many unknowns have become your friend on FB. Again, he points out that fitting in isn’t important to most people because we’re really good at ignoring new trends or big ideas. Mainly because nobody has the energy required to worry about people all day.
Godin rocks my world by confessing; those you’re worried about honestly aren’t wasting a second of their time thinking about you. They can’t hear you no matter how loud you yell.
Which could be why Howard Stern feels the way he does; 35 years in radio with over 20 million listeners and Rollingstone reports the man with the vivid view of a world in constant motion still can’t find the right thing to say that’ll invite peace to the core of his soul.
How well do you fit in? Is it important?
My first wife often accused me of not liking people, “You’re no fun! Why can’t you be like all the other guys that wanna dance, drink and misbehave all night?” She wanted to fit in. I get it! But I didn’t have it…a need to be liked so I chose to hide.
Here’s what drives 98% of this nation back into their tortoise shells….an experience that plays out everyday in workplace USA; a team of sellers walks up instantly demanding, “The client needs unique, not typical but funny and filled with enough drive to move people to their location. What’s going through your mind?”
My only reply gets me kicked out of every fit in group, “Would you ever walk up to a nationally recognized comedian and tell them to make you laugh right now?”
The question shot so far above their heads inside two seconds NASA began to report a UFO flying somewhere over Charlotte.
I’m a firm believer that even a Wal-Mart greeter has to show prep. You can’t just stand there and offer a smile unless you’ve prepared yourself for the bulky old guy attempting to bring back a patio set purchased five years ago. The Wal-Mart greeter feels no passion to fit into your life and style…their job is to help you fit into their life and style.
Two seconds inside my commercial producing rock concert of a studio here at Clear Channel and you’ll instantly feel the noise, “He’s not about fitting in your world. But damn if he won’t welcome you into his.” I have fricken Muppets hanging from the ceiling! People go to far away hospitals for this disease!
The disconnection isn’t that you don’t fit in…the crack in the pavement becomes a canyon when fitting in becomes a struggle of whose circle influences you the most to want to fit in?
I produce radio commercials, if you can’t sell me a thought inside 5, 15 or 30 seconds you don’t fit in. Ouch! Some days I don’t even like myself. But that’s a different blog!
Stop trying to fit in! No matter how many cans of beans you consumed over the weekend there's always gonna be someone around that thinks they like you.
I will always believe I you first…
arroecollins@clearchannel.com
No comments:
Post a Comment