We do a lot of things out of the ordinary.
Who ate the first banana? Did the gang of five chastise the peeling fool?
Who and what’s normal? I’m not! I’m having too much fun not wanting to be the popular kid on the radio.
I used to think quickly rushing outside to jump onto an auction purchased homemade ten speed bike with a jet black banana seat to arrest the crooks Batman and Robin couldn’t catch was what every boy did.
My friend Steve elected one morning to take a pellet gun and shoot what he assumed were pesky messy pigeons only to learn my music makers served a bigger plan.
No matter what day American businesses do things out of the ordinary. Steve Jobs changed the world while insurance companies, banks and Wall Street stockholder’s rob the world without raising a weapon.
Why do so many people race to be called President when once you arrive you’ve got no voice?
There are no bodyguards in Heaven so I can’t wait to ask Roosevelt why his drive to put people back to work stopped with him. Reagan needs to share the message behind why catsup was officially declared a vegetable during his administration. Did Ford truly trip or was it a gimmick to get people to talk?
A very famous American Idol contestant once had me escorted from his presence for asking an out of the ordinary question: You’re a common man with a common background are you the reincarnation of Elvis Presley?
I asked Richard Marx if he was the Hunchback of Notre dame and he laughingly said, “Yes…”
While doing morning television news reporting I fell off horses on purpose, hooked my skates while on the ice with Disney, slid the Mayor of a small town down the large slide in the middle of the interview! I got in big trouble when asking the Chief of police where the donuts were.
We do a lot of things out of the ordinary. Reality television is making a mint while true writers and actors have been forced to host radio shows, voice radio commercials and or create websites like Daryl Hall from Hall and Oates where it’s all about them doing what makes all that is them very happy.
I’m not the bully on the block that would inspire someone to set aside the rules about jumping off the house. I’m just the one that won’t talk you out of it.
A Broadcasting student comes up to me and says, “I expect to do this and make that amount in two years! It’s make or break! I’ll be the next or I’m out of here!”
I’m not gonna be the weighty well oiled heavily researched shirt behind the desk that drove the stake into the center of my dreams. As crazy silly as it seems, dreams are what feed reality. If you’re going to step out of the ordinary I’ll always be your first fan.
Can you imagine being there when John Lennon was introduced to Paul McCartney? What if Lee Iacocca had come to you about designing the first Mustang? The pickle! Whose wise idea was it to boil a cucumber then add the itty bitty mindless seeds called dill? The cardboard sleeve that slips around that hot cup of Beantown coffee? Now Starbucks has round cake on a stick!
Does everybody truly have to invent the world around you for you to enjoy life?
Bank of America is failing because they stopped listening to the little guy with out of the ordinary ideas. Yet Clear Channel has taken radio to a completely new playing field by introducing the single most important chunk of music history since the IPOD…free music, anytime, every time just ask.
Albums, 45’s, cassettes, 8-track tapes, MP3’s and now I Heart Radio. Where the hell was I when Bob Pittman stepped out of the ordinary and said, “Umm got an idea.”
And so this is how it goes. I’m gonna stop writing and you’re gonna stop reading. Both of our endeavors are going to return to a world where being plastic, fake, numb and puppet like is what keeps a boss in a great mood. I’m not saying do something whacky buzzer in their face bizarre but I’ll be the first to cheer when someone walking down the hall says, “It was a boring damn day until _________ did that thing.”
Do you know why decision makers and parents don’t like people like me? I’m too willing to say, “Wow that would be too fricken cool.” Nationally recognized comedian Pam Stone is the only one in my 32 years of radio to reply back, “Can we do it now?”
I miss her show so much!
arroecollins@clearchannel.com
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