Monday, December 19, 2011

2012 The Journey Back to America: Page Three

To refocus indicates a change of energy. Through education one might be made aware of but in the end to refocus becomes a ticket or a fist full of hope that’s easily burned by chance nestling opportunity.

Only a couple of times have I heard a company general manager say, “Because of economic conditions we’ve decided to make the New Year a learning place. We’re refocusing on several possibilities and in doing so we believe the end result will be a future that includes every player with us today.”

Being on this side of the white picket fence fear becomes the decision maker. You’ve been warned. There’s nothing you can do to prevent change except to prepare for it.

During the bitterly cold whispers of wind that capsized the month of January 2010 my soul was forced to refocus; a single woman, maybe 26 or less sat on the concrete block that keeps cars from jumping a storefront sidewalk.

She didn’t beg nor borrow from passerbies. Although she sat not stood on the frost covered block nobody approached her to ask, “Are you ok?”

Being only six feet from the steam that rhythmically flowed through her dirt covered nose, I kept wondering making sure I didn’t poison it with assumption. I had been there before; Melrose in Los Angeles. Each who walk beside, within and nearby carry several scents of life and style and my decision was to quickly compare without being aware. In doing so…I felt tremendous guilt.

And there I was again except this time through education and being fully aware of the shortest distance between two dots not being the best path, I chose to step away from the car and offer something as small as, “Are you lost?”

“No…” she embarrassingly replied pulling her face from the conversation as if to locate something more engaging on the fast paced street in front of us.

“Did your car break down?”

“No…” the short answer was released with no reason for me to believe she was in danger.

“Can I help you?’

“I wish somebody would’ve said that when the bank I used to work for decided to rip my department a part. I just wanna live again.”

At that moment I realized how close we all are to being homeless. She was warm compared to how frozen

I instantly became while attempting to push away corporate reality. As if to be a morning dove and I a child chasing the sky for feathers, she stood then flew away.

Walking back to my car I knew had to write. I had been given something beyond my control and in receiving it the energy to refocus became my guide.

The exact words scribbled on the back of a monthly statement from Verizon Wireless to which I’ve never thrown away:

You sit in silence and solitude, not wanting to be found. Your face is muddied by not your hand. Gone tonight is the life you once had.

Palms closed so tight my friend. Open up and let someone in.

Lost and alone on a darkened night. She feels with her memories to give her sight. She’s cold, emotion sold. And then she says, “I wanna live again.”

You sit inside your lonely thoughts holding pictures of forget-me-nots. Your shelter is shattered by not the shell. In your hand you hold your fathers pride.

The times have changed, a new generation. Open up and let someone in.

Lost and alone on a darkened night. She feels with her memories to give her sight. She’s cold, emotion sold. And then she says, “I wanna live again.”

During the arrival of a new Christmas, Pastor Flo reached toward a deeper explanation of the meaning of Mary being a virgin giving birth to a child. Whether you believe or choose to walk away. Her landscape of thought gave reason to refocus on what the symbol of a virgin is; that of new, a challenge, a journey or vision quest that overpowers the present only to find that what’s been shared with you might not be for you but rather everybody you meet along the way.

Ultimately it’s your choice to accept your true north or sit and sag in the middle wondering why the depth of every page is easily scratched away. There’s no religion in that. It’s a walk and what you take in or take away makes or breaks the start of every new day.

Stop searching and start realizing it’s already there. To refocus indicates a change of energy.

While visiting a library I’d spend more time holding chapters in a book that featured bent tips of a single page. Forgetting the story I elected to learn more about why someone before me chose that moment to seal off their reasons from moving forward with the book.

Were they tired? Could the car ride have come to a conclusion or the doctor’s office waiting room been not so busy which allowed them to step inside another reason for being? Might they have been homeless and within the next steps of an environment shut off from reality there was no way the bleeding mind of a poet could inspire them to keep moving forward.

Did my friend Scott win the war against homelessness or was he given a virgin gift that forced him to refocus. His message is powerful but how many along the way stepped from the comforts of life without judgment? It’s not natural to assume someone is homeless. It’s a lack of focus that drives your heart into believing your life is better.

What if you took the time to refocus? Upon your return who in your current circle would you terminate or is the truth of understanding on the streets we beat to death daily with cars that take us away from the places we truly need to be?

What happens if the car stalls?

arroecollins@clearchannel.com

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