Visually, scanning the jagged edges of homelessness seems approachable, without hard to digest challenges, some might even call it a vision quest to connect with a higher understanding of where this generation might be drifting.
Now that the writer whose footprints have been muddied by thirty two years of radio broadcast has stepped into the mysterious dark hole; the faces of assumption line the unmarked nights as to who is and isn’t homeless versus which family, friend or coworker will charter a headless dream giving permission to hope, faith and ambition to seize it’s desire to receive air?
Homelessness is more visual than you see.
It’s disguised to look like other methods of acceptance such as multiple families living under one roof, the same quarter acre of land featuring small one to two bedroom no bigger than a shack landmarks that resemble housing, bankruptcy terminates mortgages but in some cases you have until a year to physically leave the setting or if you spend ten minutes driving in any direction on a freeway you’ll bump into the modern gypsy; American’s that have walked away from neighborhoods and city streets, country cabins and lakeside waves to accept constant moving by way of RVing.
Homelessness isn’t just the bum snuggled up in a blanket at a bus stop begging for a buck or scratching his or her fingers across five strings of a heavily weathered guitar chanting songs written along the way.
Pastor Flo was extremely clear when explaining, “Are they houseless or homeless? Do they suffer from disconnection?”
Standing outside Presbyterian Hospital in Charlotte, NC on New Year’s Eve, my conversation with a short dirty bearded man with crusted fingertips and stained tips smoking the last 1/8th of an inch off his only smokes began with, “Are you without a home tonight?”
“I have a home!” His well focused reply instantly bounced off me. “If they let me back into this place I know exactly where I’m gonna be tonight.”
Pulling from his jacket was a nicely folded sheet of paper that categorically in a lawyers way explained that because he chose to smoke that he wouldn’t be allowed in. Sucking in a lung full of what used to be he found no reason to believe that he fit the category I had suggested, therefore every question I very politely shared was blocked by what Scott a former street warrior called my misunderstanding.
It was I who was uneducated.
Scott explains, “If you’re watching TV and a man walks into your house without knocking, you’d feel invaded. Walking up to the assumed homeless man put his defenses up just like yours.”
I would never walk up to someone in an RV and start things out with, “How long you been without a roof?”
If it looks like a duck, waddles like a duck…in the world of homelessness that doesn’t mean you’re standing next to something that’s going to quack.
This week The Interviewer took not five but one question to the web with shielded five different answers: How should I approach the homeless?
Reply number one: Homeless people aren't all necessarily the cliche "hobos" the media displays for us to see. I've talked to many, and they're all normal people. All the homeless people I've met so far have spoken perfect English. You have to remember that most of these homeless people were once average people although some others may have been born homeless which is a rare case. Talk to them like normal people, really! In your world, there are fat, pretty, ugly, skinny, mean, nice, tall, and short people. -Well, it's basically the same in the homeless world. Offer them a meal with a drink, sit down beside them and ask a simple question "Hi, my name is ________. Do you care for a meal? I've been walking around this whole day, the weather is really nice. How are you today, sir/ma'am?" If they nod or reply yes, hand them their meal politely. Don't start to personally, and don't ask for their name too early, instead ask them as you leave "It was wonderful meeting you. I'll come again next weekend if you don't mind. Oh, and what is your name?"
Replay number two: I did a project on people and their different life styles and one day while I was going to grab some lunch to go…this guy who, when he talked sounded like anyone else not like "change change, can I have a dollar, do you have any money to spare?" He was really polite. I asked if he had plans for the rest of the day. He said, “No…” like expected. I asked him if he would like to join me for lunch. I found out how he became homeless and the inside "scoop" on the homeless journey to survive and make it to the next day.
Reply number three: I usually just smile and say, “Hi!” I've seen people engaged in conversation with homeless people and I think as long as you're friendly and treat them respectfully, you can begin a conversation too. If you're doing this for a project, it would only be right to give them a few dollars or buy them a meal while you're talking, because their time is valuable too.
Ok stop right there. This brings me to a conversation with Scott whose personal vow is to take $300 from his entrepreneurial pocket and hand out the money $50 at a time.
Instantly I gulped! $50 is a ton of cash to give to a person you don’t know especially since society has taught us that nearly every cent of it will be spent on drugs, alcohol or cigarettes.
“At least I know they’ll be warm tonight,” was Scott’s reply. “Warm with hope. The first thing you lose out on the street is hope. A man walks up and gives you fifty bucks and for the first time in weeks your heart feels something incredibly special.”
Interviewer: How should I approach the homeless?
Reply number four: I once stayed in a homeless shelter in Denver for a while. Went into a stupid "Work Oriented" rehab program there. Did it instead of going to jail for four months. Worked 13 hours a day cleaning up human waste and puke, being eaten up by bedbugs, cooking dinner and washing dishes for our "guests" and putting up with all manner of verbal and physical abuse from them. A few, really just a few, were friendly and appreciative. The rest were just ornery, dangerous, ugly, shiftless, disgusting human junk. I got in a lot of fights. More than I did in jail.
If they can get away with it, most will kill you and strip you in ten minutes flat. Kill you for ten bucks. If I had it to do over I'd just go back to jail.
Reply number five: I encounter homeless people five days out of the week. A few months back, I had a good discussion with a friend about homeless people. He was passionate in a practical way. He had experience. His advice was simple - just talk to them. They're human too. That's scary. They're not like me. They may smell. I'm in a hurry. Talk to them about what? What if they ask for money? He proceeded to tell me that homeless people just want you to talk to them. They don't want to be a project. My friend mentioned the idea of keeping a few cans of chili in the back of my car just for a homeless occasion. I didn't have to store those cans for long. Anthony was his name. I met him at a Shell just down the street from school. He asked me for money. I asked him if he was hungry. And out came the chili. We sat on the sidewalk with our chili and talked, like new friends. He is 28 years old and was jumped in the park the night before. He told me of his family and how long he had been homeless (10 years). His dad finds him from time to time and gives him money. He has a driver's license, but only for identification. He showed me where he slept the night before. All the while I was holding back tears.
arroecollins@clearchannel.com
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