The Q.C.! Queen City! One sign downtown reads: Tree City USA. Charlotte is home of the Panther’s, Michael Jordan’s Bobcat’s, Billy Graham’s birthplace, it’s the Charlotte Motor Speedway, Charlotte Douglas International Airport and now the world headquarters of Chiquita Banana’s.
Not too good! Students in the Charlotte Mecklenburg school system will spend the next six months attempting to spell banana. Does it have two side by side “N’s” or can we get away with texting monkey food?
Chiquita will set up shop in the NASCAR Hall of Fame.
Not too good! Who associates banana’s with racing? How long before a long haired country boy steps up to the Channel 3 microphone and accuses local leaders of stereotyping oval fanatics, “We passion the sport we ain’t gone banana’s for it?”
The arrival of Chiquita peels away the recession adding fruit to the environment in the shape of 400 plus jobs that fork out over a 100 grand a year. An increase in housing sales will blanket the front page of the Observer, with people comes money to shop at South Park, Carolina Place, North Lake and Concord Mills. Sales tax cha ching means no reason to bleed an already dried turnip.
Not too good! The invitation to come to Charlotte came with a 22 million dollar tax break incentive. That’s 22 million that could’ve been spent on another unknown artist statue on the corner of Queens, Queens and Queens.
Seattle has Microsoft and Boeing. New York is blessed with Wall Street and David Letterman. They still make movies in Hollywood. Orlando brags about Disney World. Nashville whoops and hollers with the best in Country Music. St. Louis got the arch. Dallas was blessed with the Cowboy cheerleaders. The Golden Gate Bridge is in San Fran. Butte, Montana was once the home of professional wrestler Brett the Hit Man Hart and daredevil Evil Knievel. Charleston has Southern hospitality. Elvis came from Memphis and Charlotte is now Chiquita, NC.
Actually…that kinda has a ring to it. It goes perfect with Hendersonville’s annual Apple Festival.
“Where you from?”
“Chiquita...”
Not too good! If the Charlotte Knights ever move downtown, the new stadium will be branded Chiquita Field. Players will hit the diamond sporting yellow suits with an easy to remove blue sticker in the center of their back.
Wait! This just in! Where is Larry Sprinkle from NBC6 to break this story?
Exotic plant lover’s with Caribbean tastes that cake their homes and backyard decks with palm tree looking things purchased at Lowes, Home Depot and roadside horticulturalist no longer have to waste Saturday afternoons trying to explain why such a leafy green machine with an assumed strong trunk can’t survive within the warmth of our coldest winters.
The banana tree God’s have sent us their messenger!
Congratulations Charlotte, North Carolina you landed the big fish that didn’t get away. Stuff that nanner and put a nail in the wall; time to enter another great moment on our walk of fame. Maybe now we’ll get enough money from Raleigh to finish I-485. I heard they love bananas in the decision portion of Chiquita USA.
arroecollins@clearchannel.com
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